Situations that are unfavorable happens all the time. In the case of my family, I could maybe assumed that there is a systemic approach to them.
My parents would usually told us what's happening or will be going to happen, or rather nag about them ? What ever, they are being communicated to us and then me and my brother would usually give a suggestion or two. My parent would usually try to solve the problem by himself/herself using the best possible solution.
Would i say that is systematic ? At least the children are aware of the problems the family is facing at the point of time.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Power Relations
Power relations ? I guessed there is a mixed between commanding and discussing that my parents practice.
There are times when forcing have to be execute in order to get things done right, although I may hate that particular matter, it may very well just be the best choice for me. Examples are that parents would not give a choice to their children as to what time they wants to be in bed. My parents, especially my dad forces us on lots of things, but as i grew up the subject of matter slowly grew lesser and lesser as it may well already become a part of me.
On the other hand, discussion between parents and children before making a choice onto the child is as important too. Some matters just can't be forced onto the child or it may very well caused some negative impacts. Examples are that extra course or activities the child took up, the child should have the right to choose what they like to pick up and learn through them, forcing another undesired choice onto them make them sick of it as they have no interest in them at all.
My parents very well respects my decisions in most cases. They have also implant into me morale values and what I should and should not do through the practice of authoritarian parenting from young. Now I would follow those rules meant for me as a child even though i have already grow up, just because I was lead to follow the rules right when i was growing up as a kid.
There are times when forcing have to be execute in order to get things done right, although I may hate that particular matter, it may very well just be the best choice for me. Examples are that parents would not give a choice to their children as to what time they wants to be in bed. My parents, especially my dad forces us on lots of things, but as i grew up the subject of matter slowly grew lesser and lesser as it may well already become a part of me.
On the other hand, discussion between parents and children before making a choice onto the child is as important too. Some matters just can't be forced onto the child or it may very well caused some negative impacts. Examples are that extra course or activities the child took up, the child should have the right to choose what they like to pick up and learn through them, forcing another undesired choice onto them make them sick of it as they have no interest in them at all.
My parents very well respects my decisions in most cases. They have also implant into me morale values and what I should and should not do through the practice of authoritarian parenting from young. Now I would follow those rules meant for me as a child even though i have already grow up, just because I was lead to follow the rules right when i was growing up as a kid.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Family Relationship and Age.
My relationship with my family have changed over the years as i inch closer and closer towards adulthood. I'm sure it happens to almost everyone.
It is not that the level of feeling or understanding towards them have lowered over the years. People tend to get less clinging towards parents the older the get, you don't visit places that you used to with your family anymore. I might in fact slowly confine more to my friends than to my family members the older I grew.
I would no longer rush towards and hug my dad when he came home from work like how I used to. It would be awkward to do that now wouldn't it ? I no longer hold on to my mum's hand when I goes shopping with her.
My relation with my brother sure does gets on the better side. How in the world would we ever fight again just because of toys ? As we matured, lots of things will change and will no longer be part of our life...
It is not that the level of feeling or understanding towards them have lowered over the years. People tend to get less clinging towards parents the older the get, you don't visit places that you used to with your family anymore. I might in fact slowly confine more to my friends than to my family members the older I grew.
I would no longer rush towards and hug my dad when he came home from work like how I used to. It would be awkward to do that now wouldn't it ? I no longer hold on to my mum's hand when I goes shopping with her.
My relation with my brother sure does gets on the better side. How in the world would we ever fight again just because of toys ? As we matured, lots of things will change and will no longer be part of our life...
Monday, June 7, 2010
Conversations
Thinking about how conversations happened in my family, i realized there is no particular individual responsible for initiating them. Everyone does.
I would often go to my mother about matters of the heart that i cannot understand and solve myself. She would always give me the best advice she had on right on her mind then. She would also occasionally chat up with me on various topics such as daily matters, health and food.
Conversations between my dad and I comes natural especially on topics which we both have interest on. We would often talk about soccer whenever there's a match or transfer happening. He would also always talk to me about his job, what he was encountering during the day, the progress on his new job. I would always open up to him whenever I had a tiff with my mum.
Being the only sibling I have in the family, my brother will be, of course the one I talked to the most. We would always discuss stuffs that are happening in School or with our friends and things that we can't let our parents know. Being the junior, he would always have questions regarding his schoolwork which I could be of help.
I would often go to my mother about matters of the heart that i cannot understand and solve myself. She would always give me the best advice she had on right on her mind then. She would also occasionally chat up with me on various topics such as daily matters, health and food.
Conversations between my dad and I comes natural especially on topics which we both have interest on. We would often talk about soccer whenever there's a match or transfer happening. He would also always talk to me about his job, what he was encountering during the day, the progress on his new job. I would always open up to him whenever I had a tiff with my mum.
Being the only sibling I have in the family, my brother will be, of course the one I talked to the most. We would always discuss stuffs that are happening in School or with our friends and things that we can't let our parents know. Being the junior, he would always have questions regarding his schoolwork which I could be of help.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Practice or Not ?
My family has always stressed the importance of self management and this post will be about money management.
My allowance was given in a batch of 1 week and i had to plan myself on what I should spend to keep that amount enough to last me a week. If I were to spend too much on a day, i would have to live on instant noodles for the rest of the days. I always had this habit of keeping an extra 10 dollars in my wallet in case of emergency as I was too young then to be carrying a ATM card.
To save up for items that I wanted, I don't rant or ask from my parents to get them. I would normally save at least 1 Dollar everyday so that when I saw something of interest, I would have the money to buy it. From that, I have come to understood the idea that money don't come easily and that small savings will accumulated to huge amount as time goes by.
My allowance was given in a batch of 1 week and i had to plan myself on what I should spend to keep that amount enough to last me a week. If I were to spend too much on a day, i would have to live on instant noodles for the rest of the days. I always had this habit of keeping an extra 10 dollars in my wallet in case of emergency as I was too young then to be carrying a ATM card.
To save up for items that I wanted, I don't rant or ask from my parents to get them. I would normally save at least 1 Dollar everyday so that when I saw something of interest, I would have the money to buy it. From that, I have come to understood the idea that money don't come easily and that small savings will accumulated to huge amount as time goes by.
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